Those four letters…
Love. This simple four letter word is so meaningful yet also so abused, so sincere yet also so misunderstood. It is used a lot yet not used enough. We all have our own definition of love. This definition can change throughout time and can take on a whole new meaning and level through each experience with it.
I used to use the word love freely – with friends, with desires, within relationships… I guess I was young, and not yet experienced enough to really understand what the word meant to me. I used to confuse the word love with lust and in retrospect, often “fell in love” with hypothetical dream worlds created in my naive and innocent mind rather than the person themself.. Throughout my experiences I have abused the word, feared the word and finally, at age twenty five and three quarters, am finally learning how to embrace the word.
To me, the words “I love you” is a commitment. It is a statement of declaration that promises that you love the other person unconditionally – without judgement and without prejudice and will continue doing so until the end of time. While of course it is possible to love someone at one point and not love them at another, I think that a declaration of love means you intend to commit to care for them in your heart for the long run – even if they at times annoy you, anger you and even hurt you.
In order to love someone, you need to know them – meaning not the one or two sides they choose to present, but their different sides that come out in their different roles and experiences. Is that person consistent in their principles as a friend, a brother, a restaurant patron, a travel companion? You may find that you “love” someone as your lover, but are appalled when you see their character when playing a different role.
What about love at first sight?
Have you ever met someone and almost instantaneously, you felt this incredible passion for them? Perhaps it was love at first sight….or not.
Perhaps what your really experienced was lust at first sight? Now, I may sound like a skeptic, and I’m sure there are plenty of relationships out there that experienced love at first sight and are now living happily ever after. But, in my theory of needing to truly know someone to truly love them, love at first sight doesn’t exist. But hey, who am I to doubt? I’ve definitely experienced a magnetic attraction and unexplanable passion and care for someone I hardly knew – so perhaps there are some holes to my theory. On that note, I’ll end off with a lovely song… 
L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don’t break it
Love was made for me and you
L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please don’t break it
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you,,,
–Nat King Cole