We live in a society where we are socialized to escape. If there is a problem, patch it up and keep going in the rush of life. How often do we sit down and take the time to feel our emotions and get to the root of our problems and issues? The easy thing to do is to block your emotions, cut yourself off from feelings and pain and numb it, ignore it and try and forget it. We do this by taking tranquilizers. Tranquilizers can come in many forms, some use partying, alcoholism, drugs, sex, shopping, work overload…what type of tranquilizer you use is not important, rather, it is the act of using one. Escapism is normalized and after a while, it becomes part of your daily behavior. The thing is, these issues, these problems, these bottled up emotions and pain, they don’t just magically disappear. They manifest inside you, make you jaded, block you from opportunities…they can slowly kill your spirit and restrict you from finding true happiness and inner peace.

“It is as if we are continually chasing mirages, only to be disappointed when they do not give us the satisfaction for which we had hoped” – Kelsang Gyatso

Whenever I find myself in a situation, whether it be in business or personal, I try to do the exact opposite of what normal people do. I look at the easy route and take the harder one. The easy route is to be jaded, the easy route is to be negative. The easy route is to not take responsibility over your actions. The easy route is to escape. The easy route is to miss out on opportunities because of fear…fear of pain, fear of failure, fear of hurt. Most people in this world take the easy routes…and unfortunately, that is why most people in our N. American culture are unhappy and unfulfilled.

“Real fearlessness is the product of tenderness. It comes from letting the world tickle your heart, your raw and beautiful heart. You are willing to open up with that resistance or shyness and face the world. You are willing to share your heart with others” – kelsang Gyatso

What has motivated me to write this? A few reasons. First, because I know many people who do not take ownership of their actions. They make excuses. Instead of looking at themself and analysing their own behavior and patterns, they blame others. Even in a situation where you may think you are completely right, it is important to really analyze yourself, dig into your subconscious and understand your real feelings. Second, I have been hurt before. It’s no one’s fault, but I struggle everyday to not resent and to stay positive. I struggle to not do the easy thing and block out the pain. Instead, I cry when I feel like it and I admit to myself that I’m human and its okay to not always be in control and be sad sometimes. Sometimes I am tempted to just be a bitch – hate, blame and be jaded. I allow myself to feel those emotions but then make the choice to not get on the train with it.
Lastly, there are a few people that I care about so much but live in a jaded world and have so many issues and emotions that they have blocked off from dealing with. I see how this affects their relationships with people and business and opportunities in other realms of life. You see, when you have negativity or unresolved issues inside you, you can easily pop a pill or get intoxicated to not deal with it and see it as “your own problem” to deal with.  The thing is, that’s selfish, because its not your “own problem” because your energy will rub off on other people and affect people who care about you. So when you think, I’m not hurting anyone by not taking care of myself, think again. I work on myself and take care of myself because that is the only way I can spread love and positive energy to others and people I care about.

So all this discussion leads me to another bigger point I want to express. Empowerment. If you know me personally or just a bit of me through what I write on myspace, you will notice that I have a set of values and principles that I live by. I’ve realized that I feel empowered because I am consistent in all fields with these values and I do not compromise them. Whether it be business, friendships or relationships, I have a foundation that I always follow. Integrity, respect for others, passion, consideration, long term thinking vs short term thinking, loyalty and love. For me, it doesn’t matter where I am in life or what stage…I can be up I can be down, I can be in a party mode or work mode…where is irrelevant. What is important is that I try to CONSISTENTLY abide by those set of values and principles in everything I do. That, to me, is empowering.